Chapter 7: The Three Fundamentals
- There are three ways in which we share our truth with women. And those three ways
will make up the bulk of this book. The three ways are:
- Honest Living - building an attractive and abundant lifestyle so that quality
women who are most compatible with you naturally gravitate into your life.
- Honest Action - overcoming your fears and anxieties so that you may act on your
impulses and desires without hesitation or shame
- Honest Communication - training you to express yourself openly and effectively,
in a dynamic and interesting way that will keep women interested in you and
help you make that transition to becoming physical with them.
- Honest Living - building an attractive and abundant lifestyle so that quality
- The first way of expressing our truth involves developing a lifestyle that makes us happy.
The second way of expressing truth is by being courageous and fighting through our
fears and anxieties. And the third way of expressing truth is by communicating well and
being uninhibited in our sexuality.
- Honest living, or creating an attractive lifestyle involves really drilling down and
understanding what you want as a man for your life. If you’re in a job you hate with
hobbies you hate and friends you don’t like, then no matter what you do or how much
money you make, you’re going to have a hard time meeting attractive women that you
enjoy and who enjoy being with you. There are specific reasons for this that we’ll get
into, but the overarching reason is that you are not living your life honestly to yourself.
If your true passion is art and you push paper around at an insurance firm, then you’re
not living honestly with yourself
- Honest action is overcoming your fear and anxiety around women. Our anxiety is
another form in which we highly invest ourselves in others and avoid our truth. Like
lifestyle, it also seems to almost be embedded in us and something that requires a lot of
thought and effort to repair over a longer period of time.
- I call it honest action because it is honesty in the strictest terms: if you see a beautiful
woman and have a desire to meet her, to not take action and meet her is a form of
dishonesty to yourself. If you’re standing in a bar, and you see a cute girl, and you keep
looking at her all night afraid to do something, on a deep level, you’re being dishonest
to your intentions and sexuality. You’re being needy and unable to expose your
vulnerability. All fear around your sexuality is a result of neediness. If you’re afraid to approach a woman, it’s because somewhere in you, you are more invested in her opinion of you than you are of yourself. If you’re afraid to ask a girl to come home with
you, it’s because you are afraid of the sexual reality that you want to sleep with her --
you’re more invested in her NOT rejecting you than you are in aligning yourself with
your desires.
- Honest communication or learning to express yourself freely and effectively. This is
what most dating advice sells and classifies as “game.” A good sense of humor, the
ability to connect with people, telling stories, engaging people’s attention, having
charisma, and expressing your sexuality openly, these are all parts of this fundamental. I
call it honest communication because it’s learning how to communicate your true
intentions and emotions. Often we have certain thoughts or feelings, but we don’t know
the best way to convey those thoughts or feelings -- this third fundamental focuses on
how to do that.
- Honest communication will determine the efficiency and in which you are able to
seduce women as well as the compatibility of women you seduce. What I mean by
efficiency to seduce is that a man with poor communication skills may have 10 women
attracted to him, but because he can’t convey his thoughts and emotions.
- If you are scared to death of saying anything to a woman you find attractive, then the
best conversation tricks, teasing and flirting lines, or even openers are not going to help
you at all